My mom died when I was ten. In my last life (Irina), she died in childbirth and I grew up with my dad for a time, a parallel to this life.
I met up with my dad recently (my father in both this life and the last) for beers, and we were talking and laughing about whatever when the subject of me as a baby came up. He got kind of serious and described the birth process as being strangely traumatic for my mom. I had been delivered by C section and she had to stay in the hospital for the requisite amount of recovery time, but the whole thing just wiped her out, and she turned to my dad and said in a serious tone, “I’m not doing that again.” And she meant it. During this conversation, my dad’s girlfriend rushed in to assure me that she had had three C sections and bounced back from all of them. But my dad just said the whole thing was strange, it was like my mom had been hit by a truck the way she had been affected by the birth experience. Right then, I almost blurted out “it was because she died in childbirth the last time!”
When my mom was dying, I never once questioned the reality of what was happening. I understood what death was and never thought a lot about why it happened, why she didn’t stay or where she was going. But things suddenly made sense for me hearing my dad tell that story. It was as if my mom gave birth to me, waited to see my dad and I were on our feet, and then passed on, having had the chance to have the birth experience and live through it to settle the trauma that had arisen from that death last time.
It was really humbling to realize that we had maybe healed past life trauma through my birth in this life. I don’t, of course, know the full story of my mom’s intended life plan while she was here, but all the same it is humbling to think that giving birth to me and seeing it through was something she had needed to do in her life. Even though I know a major thing like that was planned out in advance, I sort of choked up to think of my birth being a soul goal for someone. We had sort of a shaky relationship dynamic in the last few years of her life, so learning this really gave me a huge appreciation for the whole thing.
I haven’t yet told my dad about our past lives. It’s something I really want to do but I’m not sure how he’d react, so for now I’ll just keep it to myself.